My brain is roving all over my internal terrain. Over boulders, scaling rocky mountain faces, tip toeing through streams, leaping through fields, but I cannot find that quiet place in my mind. I skip away as soon as I attempt to settle and to land in my heartspace. My fingers are fidgeting, and I keep stretching them to turn on some music. But I have decided that for a little while at least, it is to be quiet here.
It is all too easy to get wrapped up in the day’s to do list, what other people need me to do, what deadlines are hovering. I can pop out of my heartspace in a moment’s notice, while it is so hard to spiral back there and to land solidly. I don’t want to be quiet and to sit with myself this morning. I want to embrace my jittery-ness, but I know that sitting still, holding space for myself and what lives in my heart this day, will bring about a day where I can embrace the present instead of rush to the next thing all day long.
I light some incense. I make peace with the pull to rush into five activities at once. I breathe deep into my heartspace. I picture a luxurious, squishy, blue, velvet chair, where I am nestled in with a blanket over my lap. Here I will sit and listen. I am holding some words in my heartspace to meditate on while I breathe deep, sink in, and hold space for what is. My prayers this day anchor me to my own interior cozy chair, so that I may live one moment at a time, so I may bring peace to my life first and then to others.
Back in the fifth century, Marsilio Ficino said, “The mind tends to go off on its own so that it seems to have no relevance to the physical world. At the same time, the materialistic life can be so absorbing that we get caught in it and forget about spirituality. What we need, he said, is soul, in the middle, holding together mind and body, ideas and life, spirituality and the world.”
I sit in that middle place today, anchored in, and wakefully rest in my heartspace.
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Now the day can begin.
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(The chair can be found along with some other wonderful, cozy furniture photos at: http://thisdesignerspalette.blogspot.co.uk/2011/09/whats-better-than-anthropologie.html)